Dennis Miller

“The cynical interpretation of Miller’s low slide to the right is that, having lost his talkshow on HBO and his spot on ABC’s Monday Night Football, he’s angling for a gig on MSNBC or Fox News, which would gladly welcome a lapsed liberal lashing out against former showbiz colleagues and allies.” – James Wolcott

  • “That brings us to… well, you know where that brings us, to the French. The French, you might as well gas up the dinghy and go fishing with Fredo because you are dead to me, okay. You know something?”
  • “These pricks are now putting — they’re putting swastikas on our flag in France. You’ve got all those boys buried in Normandy. And after we had the good taste to chisel the armpit hair off the Statue of Liberty you gave us, you know something, I — always thought that tint was oxdized copper. Little did I know it was green with envy.You know something, I say we don’t let these guys on the war train now. They don’t want to be involved, fine. I say the train pulls out, leave them on the platform and say listen you’re not allowed to fight with us now. You guys want to get your hands dirty at this late date, you’ll have to run them through your own hair.”
  • “You know something, everybody’s talking about post-liberation Iraq and who should take care of it. Listen, you know they need the oil and you know there’s a lot of dirty paper on the French providing reactor parts that we’re going to unearth. I’d have a back channel call from Bush to Chirac and I’d tell him, listen, pal, you know who’s going to handle the day-to-day necessities of the noble Iraqi, it’s you, my friend. Concierge is a French word, isn’t it?”
  • “You know something, if they couldn’t — I say we invade Iraq and then invade Chirac. You run a pipe — you run a pipe from the oilfield right over this Eiffel Tower, shoot it up and have the world’s biggest oil derrick. We got a picture of it right here. Yeah. Listen, I would call the French scum bags, but that, of course, would be a disservice to bags filled with scum. I’m just saying listen, I’d like to have allies too.”
  • “What’s happening in this world right now, we have a competency chasm. We are getting real good at what we do and the whole world is going to hell in a handbasket. As that gap gets wider, they’ll hate us more and more and more. We are simultaneously the most hated, feared, loved and admired planet — nation on this planet. In short, we are Frank Sinatra and you know something, the Chairman didn’t get to be the Chairman lying down for punks outside the Fountainbleu.” – Dennis Miller on Jay Leno
  • ” The French are always reluctant to surrender to the wishes of their friends and always more than willing to surrender to the wishes of their enemies “

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